Below is a list of behaviors and attitudes that promote a healthy marriage. As you
read the list reflect on your behaviors and consider making changes where you think
you need to.
- I do everything I can to understand my spouses feelings.
- I show an interest in hearing my spouse’s opinion.
- I let my spouse feel my approval and affection.
- When I complain to my spouse I speak politely.
- I do things to build my spouse up and make my spouse feel valued.
- I avoid making sudden changes without first discussing those changes with my spouse
and giving my spouse time to adjust.
- I correct my spouse gently and respectfully.
- I avoid bringing up past faults when talking about a current complaint.
- I respond openly and verbally when my spouse wants to communicate.
- I avoid criticizing my spouse in front of the children or other people.
- I provide comfort when my spouse is sad or ill.
- I make an effort to show an interest in what my spouse feels is important in life.
- I avoid being defensives when my spouse expresses needs or feelings.
- I give my spouse compliments.
- I give my spouse freedom to pursue friendships, hobbies, and activities.
- Although we are married I respect that my spouse has needs for personal boundaries.
- I am able to let go of the need to “be right.”
- In my marriage I accept my mistakes and learn from them.
- I am forgiving when my spouse offends me.
- I give my spouse tenderness and physical affection.
- I take care to have special times alone with my spouse.
- I take time to notice what my spouse has done for me and our family.
- I share my thoughts and feeling with my spouse.
- I show an interest in listening when my spouse wants to talk.
- I do things to make my spouse feel like the most important person in the world.
- I behave humbly and do everything in my power to get along with my spouse’s relatives.
- I escort my spouse on visits to people and places.
- I do little things for my spouse, such as an unexpected kiss or coffee in bed.
- I regard my spouse as my equal.
- I show an interest in understanding and respecting my spouse’s fears.
- I give support to my spouse when he/she faces fears and difficult situations.
- I am interested in discovering my spouse’s sexual needs.
- I am careful not to offend my spouse sexually.
- I am interested in making sure my spouse feels secure in our relationship.
- I confer with my spouse before making expensive purchases.
- Going on dates with my spouse is important to me.
- I remember anniversaries, birthdays, and other special occasions.
- I share the responsibilities around the house.
- I do not speak disrespectfully to my spouse, especially when angry.
- I do not try to manipulate my spouse by withdrawing or withholding love.
- I call my spouse when I know I am going to be late.